Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg today posted a verbal apology on his Youtube channel (‘xxSniperCleggxx’) apologising for his verbal apology made last week, saying “We [The Liberal Democrats] should not have made an apology we did not intend to mean.”
“Some people were disappointed in us for apologising for making a promise we didn’t keep rather than apologising for not keeping the promise and to those people I say this, we are sorry. We should not have made the apology when we knew that we did not regret our decision.”
When asked about his opinion on the matter man-on-the-street Jimmy Juarez said “I thought it was great. I felt that I could really relate to him; when I saw that he was recording the video in the bath I was thinking ‘Hey! He has baths just like me! What a great guy!’.”
Students and embittered life-long liberals have begun producing and selling effigies of the Deputy Prime Minister in three varieties ‘for burning, for stabbing and for urinating on’. Having seen these models and having bought some for himself Clegg says he is happy to see them sold as long as the money raised is donated to charity. “After all,” said Clegg “there’s nothing wrong with a bit of fire now and then” referring to his burning of prized German cacti as a 16-year-old exchange student.